GET OVER IT! There ain’t no free coffee refills!
When traveling, to have the best experiences, I believe one has to try to fit in rather than stand out. Of course no matter how hard one tries to be an American in Italy (or elsewhere outside of the US) and fit in as a local, you’ll always be singled out as a foreigner. The operative words here are TRY TO FIT IN RATHER THAN STAND OUT.
This is, to me, simply a matter of respect and cordiality. Rather than expecting people to change for you, act the part of the guest and change for your host(s).
I watched an exchange in the Munich airport on my return from my last trip to Italy in May. I came on a commuter flight from Ancona, and had a layover of several hours in Munich before my flight to Philadelphia. It was getting near time for lunch, so I grabbed a ham and cheese pastry, a sparkling water, and a beer, and sat down to eat.
Sitting there, I noticed an older American couple enter the café. They spoke to each other about how they wanted the ham and cheese pastry, but then made the service person explain what every pastry in the display was – maybe 20 types – and then they ordered two ham and cheese pastries. From this, I knew I had to watch them more closely because I was certain the material for a blog entry was just around the corner. It was.
The lady spent a considerable time himing and hawing about what she wanted to drink, and just as much time himing and hawing about what type of coffee she wanted once she decided she wanted a coffee. She chose a cappuccino. They then sat right behind me.
First, they started bitching at each other about some irrelevant comment the husband made … she contended he was trying to make fun of her, he contended he was just answering a question she asked. They went back and forth like two bickering 6-year-old kids. I wanted to grab my tray and smack them both upside the head.
Then, the lady finished her coffee and went to the counter and asked for a refill. The service person asked if she would like another coffee … as you know, Europeans are not in the habit of “refilling” used coffee cups but providing a new one ... and for the regular charge. She asked if it was a “free refill”. He responded that there was no such thing as a “free refill” … if she wanted another coffee, she’d have to pay for it ... but he did it very politely. She then proceeded to bitch at him, bitch on the way back to her table, and bitch to her husband once she got there. It was actually pretty funny at this point because she was so lathered up; she was making no sense … kind of in an out-of-control fury.
I was going to say something to her, to help her understand the cultural and practical differences she had just experienced, but I was too tired, and frankly didn’t feel she’d respond too well to my trying to help. She looked and acted like the old dog that wasn’t going to learn any new tricks.
I can almost guarantee she went home and told anyone and everyone who would listen that she was treated poorly and “ripped off” in Munich … which I happen to feel is one of the finer cities in the world.
A shame really, that her inability to adapt, and understand, might possibly encourage someone else not to travel there … just possibly.
This is, to me, simply a matter of respect and cordiality. Rather than expecting people to change for you, act the part of the guest and change for your host(s).
I watched an exchange in the Munich airport on my return from my last trip to Italy in May. I came on a commuter flight from Ancona, and had a layover of several hours in Munich before my flight to Philadelphia. It was getting near time for lunch, so I grabbed a ham and cheese pastry, a sparkling water, and a beer, and sat down to eat.
Sitting there, I noticed an older American couple enter the café. They spoke to each other about how they wanted the ham and cheese pastry, but then made the service person explain what every pastry in the display was – maybe 20 types – and then they ordered two ham and cheese pastries. From this, I knew I had to watch them more closely because I was certain the material for a blog entry was just around the corner. It was.
The lady spent a considerable time himing and hawing about what she wanted to drink, and just as much time himing and hawing about what type of coffee she wanted once she decided she wanted a coffee. She chose a cappuccino. They then sat right behind me.
First, they started bitching at each other about some irrelevant comment the husband made … she contended he was trying to make fun of her, he contended he was just answering a question she asked. They went back and forth like two bickering 6-year-old kids. I wanted to grab my tray and smack them both upside the head.
Then, the lady finished her coffee and went to the counter and asked for a refill. The service person asked if she would like another coffee … as you know, Europeans are not in the habit of “refilling” used coffee cups but providing a new one ... and for the regular charge. She asked if it was a “free refill”. He responded that there was no such thing as a “free refill” … if she wanted another coffee, she’d have to pay for it ... but he did it very politely. She then proceeded to bitch at him, bitch on the way back to her table, and bitch to her husband once she got there. It was actually pretty funny at this point because she was so lathered up; she was making no sense … kind of in an out-of-control fury.
I was going to say something to her, to help her understand the cultural and practical differences she had just experienced, but I was too tired, and frankly didn’t feel she’d respond too well to my trying to help. She looked and acted like the old dog that wasn’t going to learn any new tricks.
I can almost guarantee she went home and told anyone and everyone who would listen that she was treated poorly and “ripped off” in Munich … which I happen to feel is one of the finer cities in the world.
A shame really, that her inability to adapt, and understand, might possibly encourage someone else not to travel there … just possibly.
posted by Mark Pukita | 4:37 PM
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